Dear Steve and Shirley,
Several years ago my wife and I were separated. During this time we both were intimate with other people. We have since reconnected having put that behind us and completely cut off any past lovers. While out on a business trip with one of my recent employees we were talking about women in general and sharing stories and it was all fun and games until he made a reference to the "best he ever had" and then described my wife to a tee. All the way down to a unique birthmark she has in a most private place. Without prying too much, I was able to get the name... and it was her! I have remained professional at work and haven't told my wife yet but this is becoming too much to bear. I've considered firing him but besides him being a friend he is my best employee. Solid work ethic, very intelligent, and is never late to work. What do I do? If I continue along this road eventually he will meet my wife and I'm concerned that any old feelings may re-surface and cause issues either at work, at home, or both. Help!
Dear Steve and Shirley,
I'm a 36 year old divorced mother of two beautiful daughters. I'm a nurse and I provide for my mother and nephew that both live with me. About 3 years ago I was a victim of domestic violence and left my husband of 7 years. After a tumultuous time my ex is currently in jail for 15-30 years. After taking time to settle my children and myself, I met a man at party for my co-worker. We enjoyed a few dances, cocktails and good laughs. We exchanged numbers and after a week he gave me a call. We started going out and conversing frequently, we both spoke about and agreed that neither of us was ready for a major relationship. He is a wonderful father and very attentive to his daughters. He is also very sensitive and understanding about my past and me being a single mother. As time has progressed my feelings have changed. I want this man in my life. Yes, I know and reflect on the conversation we had previously but I'm in a different place and to be frank, he is not. I know he cares for me just not in the same way. He has not met my children because I am unsure where this is going probably nowhere. Every time I try to walk away I miss him. I have discussed my feelings with him and he responds with the same ole same ole. I care about you and don't want to lose you speech. I've stopped giving him the cookies even though he makes my baby hair curl. I have started to call him less and find myself not taking his calls as often. In my heart I know there is nothing I can do to make him want me but what can I do to move past this? It's been a little over a year since we started dating, how long should I wait? Or should I keep it moving? Love your show, book smart but no common sense.